Back in the early 1970's, before I was married, I met this girl at a nightclub in New York. We went out a few times. One night she said,"We'll go to my place. My roommate won't be home tonight."

So I said, "Fine," and we went back to her place. As she'd done every other time, she asked me to tie her to the bed.

Up to this point, I'd always refused; this was partially because I'd never done well with knots, even failing the scout badge test. There was no way I could call my old scoutmaster, "Hey, Mr. Strickland. It's Jay Leno. This girl wants me to tie her to the bed. What knot should I use? A 'slippery hitch'? Yeah, that sounds about right for the job. What do you recommend for a mouth gag? A tennis ball? That's not too big? Okay, if you say so. Thanks. And, Mr. Strickland, I just wanted you to know, I never believed what the other kids said about you."

Finally, though, this particular night I agreed to tie her up. And, really, when you come right down to it, if it means having sex, most guys would tie themselves to a crop duster.

To be continued...